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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29062377">Lonely Nights</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/RumbleFish14/pseuds/RumbleFish14'>RumbleFish14</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crushes, Cuddling &amp; Snuggling, Emotional, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, Romantic Friendship, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 08:21:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,043</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29062377</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/RumbleFish14/pseuds/RumbleFish14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Their first case without Hotch and Spencer is having a hard time shutting his mind down to sleep, he’s not used to all the changes happening within their team and needs someone to soothe his mind</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>136</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Lonely Nights</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lonely Nights</p><p> </p><p>Haley was dead. Gone. Buried. Hotch was as stoic as he ever was, putting on a brave face for Jack, for the team, but underneath, he was a mess. Spencer caught him crying numerous times, when he was alone and Jack was with Jessica, Haley’s sister. He hadn’t meant to spy on him those times, it just so happened when he came along and he never interrupted or asked if Hotch was okay, he clearly wasn’t. Hotch could fool Jack, he could fool the team, but Spencer knew.</p><p>It had been less than a week since she died, and after the funeral, when everyone was gathered to share memories and be together, Strauss called them in, a double murder in Nashville and they couldn’t just ignore it. They left, each saying their goodbyes and sorrys to Jack and Hotch, shaking hands or pulling Jack into the hug he might have needed. Hotch wasn’t coming, of course he wouldn’t. Haley was gone and Jack would be alone. That meant things were about to change. </p><p>Things began to unfold with the case, they split up into teams, searching and canvassing and trying to create an accurate profile, all while thinking about Hotch. They were distracted to the point they could make mistakes and if those were made, it could cost people their lives. They couldn’t afford that. They needed to remain focused on the case, on the victims and the Unsub, not on their own little tragedy. </p><p>They worked through the first night. Shacked up in the police station pouring over crime scene files, the victims lives on a white board like some school project. They traded ideas, took unlimited coffee breaks, breaks which meant someone running out for coffee and doughnuts before the next idea arose. It was literal hell. The funeral, the mourning, now a case, it couldn’t end soon enough. </p><p>Derek ordered everyone back to the hotel for a few hours. It was hitting the 48 hour mark without sleep and that meant mistakes could happen. They drove together in silence, put into two standard issue black SUV’s, each taking their rooms; Derek was in charge now and got his own, they used to share before that. Rossi never shared a room, even if he had to pay for it with his own money. That left JJ and Emily together, given that they were the girls. Spencer was alone, for the first time in a long time, the room only had one bed, instead of two, Derek wasn’t hogging all the hot water and stealing his extra pillow, or watching ESPN on the tv all night while he tried to sleep. The things that annoyed him before, he missed now. </p><p>Spencer tried everything to settle down for the night. He did as he always did and took another look at the case files, a last look with tired eyes, he never learned anything new but he had to try. He ordered from whatever Chinese place delivered at almost midnight, ordered way too much food because he always ordered for Derek too, he ate alone with the tv off. The extra food went into the mini fridge for later and he busied himself with a long, hot shower and some clean clothes. His room was just as empty as it was when he came out, everything as it had been, not in motion. Abandoned. </p><p>It didn’t feel right. </p><p>There wasn’t much he could do about those feelings of sadness and abandonment. Everyone had to be asleep, or already settled and he didn’t have anyone else to talk to about it. That’s what Derek had been to him, among many others things. At least that one didn’t have to stay a secret like the rest. Crushing on your teammate was never a good thing, either was falling in love with him, but that couldn’t be helped. There was absolutely everything to love about Derek Morgan. He went to bed alone, leaving the bathroom light on with the door cracked to break that awful feeling of darkness. </p><p>Sleep never came. His mind was far too full for rest. He thought about what Hotch was going through, he knew he wouldn’t be asleep either, possibly crying again, or watching Jack sleep, contemplating his future with the BAU or without it. Spencer couldn’t even imagine not working at the BAU and wasn’t sure how Hotch could manage a future without it. It was a difficult choice, one he didn’t envy. That got him thinking about if Hotch didn’t come back, would he be doomed to room by himself the rest of the time? It didn’t seem appropriate for him to share a room with their team leader but Derek wasn’t always their leader. </p><p>When it became clear that sleep wouldn’t happen, Spencer got up, tossed a cardigan across his bare shoulders and walked to the table to grab the files and moved back to his bed. He sat cross legged in the center, the files spread against the sheets in front of him. He saw the words, he memorized the picture, but nothing new surfaced, nothing to break the case wide open and send them all home. </p><p>His mind wasn’t in it, it was on so many other things. Derek, most of all. He wondered what he was doing, if he managed to find sleep for a few hours and let his exhausted brain rest, or if he was doing the same thing he was, unable to sleep, pouring over the files, feeling helpless and alone. But that couldn’t be, could it? Derek never felt that way, he was almost as stoic as Hotch was. He had to put up a front now that he was the boss, hiding all emotions, even from his closest friends. Was Derek thinking about Hotch, was he nervous he’d leave and put him in charge, or was he worried Hotch would return and he’d be forced to step down? Was Derek thinking about him...about how empty his room felt? </p><p>A brilliant mind was a dangerous thing when it had nothing to occupy its time. He was creating scenarios about all the good and bad things that could happen, that might happen without having any real evidence to go by. He needed something to do, anything to keep his mind busy. He tried reading first and only made it one paragraph before Derek popped into his mind. Tv was next but he channel surfed aimlessly until a headache formed between his eyes and he turned it off. </p><p>Coffee might help. Caffeine was the last thing his panicked brain needed which is why he didn’t bother with the coffee pot in his own room. He slipped on his shoes, put the cardigan on properly and made his way down to the lobby and that decaf coffee maker. He used more sugar than coffee until it was what he needed, snagged a muffin before he left and finished it before he found their hallway again. He stopped at Derek’s room, which was two down from him and six down from the girls and Rossi. He tried to walk past it but couldn’t, leaving him standing in the middle like a reanimated corpse, watching the door. </p><p>Without knowing why, Spencer approached the door. He knocked, then jerked his hand back as if it bit him, only just now realizing what he did. Now he either had to make a run for it—which didn’t seem possible, his knee was still healing from that gunshot wound last month, or wait for Derek to answer, and he had no idea what he was supposed to say. His tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth, dry and useless, his hands began to sweat, his stomach twisted painfully, making him regret that muffin. He was a mess.</p><p>Then the door opened and Derek stood there in only a pair of baggy sweatpants, faded grey ones with a hole in the left knee, Spencer could see dark skin underneath. Of course his eyes were trained down at that hole, the one imperfection that caught his eye, now he had to look all the way up his body to meet dark brown eyes and he blushed, he knew it, he felt his cheek heat and sweat gather on his forehead. This always happened around Derek, that nervous feeling, but he wasn’t always shirtless, he didn’t always have that sleepy look on his face. </p><p>“Reid, you okay?” Derek asked, worried.</p><p>Spencer blinked rapidly, trying to erase the bumps of Derek’s abs from the front of his mind. “Y-yeah, I’m okay.”</p><p>“You sure?”</p><p>“Yeah. How are you?” Spencer flushed hot again, his blush creeping down his neck to his chest. The nervous sweat was instant and he hoped Derek didn’t notice. “Sorry it’s so late.”</p><p>“Well, I’ve been better. Can’t seem to stay asleep but I guess you can’t either.” Derek held the door open, not attempting to block his body. “What’s keeping you up?”</p><p>Spencer shook his head, even when the truthful answer was on the tip of his tongue. Like always, his voice refused to work around Derek, like his brain and the rest of his body. It went on hiatus until Derek had to prompt him into talking again. It was embarrassing to say the least, but normal for them now and Derek only smiled at him, because he knew. </p><p>“You wanna come in?” Derek offered and held the door open. </p><p>“Yeah, thanks.” Spencer mumbled and walked in, eyes on the ground so he didn’t stare. It took him a second to take in the room but when he did, it looked a little like his. Half eaten Chinese food, the bed messy but not like it had been slept in, files laid on the foot, there was a wet towel draped around the back of one chair. Derek had been doing what he had. “Long night.”</p><p>Derek closed the door. “Yeah, it has been. I guess you’re awake for the same reason I am.”</p><p>Spencer refused to look up at him when he got within eyesight. It would only make things worse. “There is too much on my mind to sleep. But I’m exhausted.”</p><p>“Yeah, me too. I’ve been looking over the case files but the words are starting to blur.” Derek gathered them off the bed and tossed them onto the cluttered table, then turned. “Same with you?”</p><p>“Yeah, I couldn’t make sense of it. Which is strange because I’ve been working non stop.” </p><p>“We all have, Reid. We’ve been at it all night and up for more than two days. I’m honestly not surprised we haven’t caught a break yet.”</p><p>Derek knew, he always knew. </p><p>“Something else bothering you?”</p><p>Spencer looked up, finally meeting those soft, dark eyes and he could get lost if he looked for too long. He looked so tired, but beautiful. “Everything really. We’ve all been through a lot these past few weeks. The nonstop cases, then Foyet, then Haley’s murder and Hotch not being around anymore, then you are put in charge and now this new case…” he paused for a much needed breath, his rambling sometimes took on a life of its own. “All that and I’m not sure that’s exactly what’s keeping me up.”</p><p>“I’ll admit, that’s a lot of baggage for us right now. So much so that I’m worried about this case and where our heads are at. But that’s the job, we should be used to that.” Derek studied his shifty behavior, his wandering eyes, avoiding his gaze for a certain period of time. All Reid type behaviors but something was off. “What do you think is keeping you up?</p><p>By this point, Spencer was in a full on panic, even when he remained calm on the outside. He was trained to divert his emotions, to hide them, to keep them to himself and that’s what he was doing but he had to fight it. He knew Derek well enough to know he knew something was going on. But not what exactly that was, and he was stubborn enough to push until he got his answer. Given his limited amount of room, he couldn’t pace to take the edge off and he didn’t have anything aside from coffee in his hand to occupy him, that meant he’d end up spilling his guts in another rant within seconds. </p><p>“Reid?” Derek asked, moving up to touch his arm. “What’s wrong?”</p><p>Spencer licked his dry hips, swallowed back his pulse and met his eyes again. He saw worry and fear and love. “I was actually thinking about you. Or the lack of you, to be precise. My room is very empty and quiet and my mind is running a mile a minute and I can’t shut it off.” The rant was already in full swing and Derek couldn’t even mask his shock, it was there for him to see and he kept going. “I couldn’t focus on the case or the tv and reading didn’t help, which is odd because reading always helps but I kept reading the same page over and over and over again and can’t even remember what I read.” </p><p>Derek reached out, stopping his neck breath full of mindless ranting. Spencer was breathless, embarrassed and unsure what to do or feel or how to act or what not to do. He was unnerved. </p><p>“Whoa, easy, pretty boy.” Derek let out a breathless chuckle, he too was uncertain where this would go. “You can’t sleep because of me?”</p><p>Spencer nodded, not trusting his voice for a moment. </p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“Because, for as long as we have worked together, we always share a room when we have to go out of town.” Spencer dug his nails into his palm, hoping the pain diverted his brain from rant-city. “And now that you’re acting Unit Chief, you don’t need to share a room with any of us and since Rossi never shares a room and JJ and Emily are both girls...I’m kinda left alone.”</p><p>Derek narrowed his eyes. “Spencer, when we room together all you do is complain that I’m too loud or what I watch and all my clothes all over the place. I thought you’d want to have your own space, that’s why I chose a separate room.”</p><p>“Yeah, and those things did bother me for a time. But now that it’s not there...I kind of miss it all.” Spencer had to look away, that sad expression was enough to make him cry on the best of days, now especially. “It feels like I’ve been alone in that room for days instead of hours. Nothing feels right, then lack of noise is frustrating.”</p><p>He could tell Derek hadn’t expected that, it was all over his face and it made Spencer regret saying something in the first place. Now Derek would think he depended on him when they worked cases out of town and he’d become a burden. Derek would have to share a room with him just to ensure that he’d get the right amount of sleep and have a clear headspace. </p><p>“Uh, just forget I said anything.” Spencer turned towards the door when Derek tried to reach out to him. But he didn’t make it far. His wrist was locked in a tight, but powerless grip, meaning he could pull away in seconds if he wanted to, but he didn’t. “It’s just an adjustment. Nothing to worry about. I think I’m already feeling better.”</p><p>“You’ve always been a bad liar, Reid. I can read you like a children’s book.” Derek eased up his grip but didn’t drop his hand. “Why don’t we talk about this? Maybe it’ll help clear your mind and get some sleep”</p><p>“I don’t want to take up any more of your time.”</p><p>“Reid, will you stop acting like I’m your boss?”</p><p>Spencer narrowed his eyes in true confusion. “You are my boss.”</p><p>Derek laughed. “Yeah, technically, but I’m your friend and your team mate. I’m not like Hotch, we don’t have the same relationship as we did with him. You can talk to me about what’s on your mind, just like before when I was just SSA Derek Morgan.”</p><p>“I don’t really know what to say.” Spencer turned to face him, a little disappointed when Derek’s hand dropped from his arm. “I pretty much said it all.”</p><p>“Yeah, in hypnospeak, which I didn’t understand all the way. I caught some of it, the case and Hotch. I’m sorry the room change isn’t what you wanted. I thought I was doing you a favor.”</p><p>“You were, really and if I was normal I wouldn’t have a problem with it but everything seems off now. I don’t like change of any kind, not you as team leader or Hotch not with us, not us in separate rooms. It’s just messing with my mind.”</p><p>“To be honest, I’m not liking it very well either.” Derek sighed tiredly. “I know us always being stuck together is hard, we get on each other’s nerves more than we get along. I just assumed us splitting up would solve it but I think it made it worse.”</p><p>Spencer was a little petrified. Derek was as private about his life as he was, he didn’t open up like this very often and when he did, it meant it had a heavy impact, just like it did for him. Derek was having the same issues he was, and he didn’t try to hide it or play it off like he could have. He was being honest, open. </p><p>“Specialists would say that makes us codependent on each other.”</p><p>“Yeah, most likely, or we are just used to the way things were and didn’t want them to change.” Derek smiled. “It makes sense that we miss each other—for lack of a better word. We are so used to always being together that not being together feels weird. We don’t realize it until it’s too late, like now.”</p><p>Spencer swallowed thickly, Derek knew exactly what he was saying, what he was feeling. He shouldn’t be so surprised, Derek always knew somehow. And as always, his emotions got all out of control, unsure of how to feel when Derek said things like that, if he should or shouldn’t react. </p><p>“I do miss it.” Spencer said after a moment and felt those eyes on him, like Derek was trying to peel his skin off and look at all those raw nerves underneath. “And it seems I can’t sleep without it.”</p><p>“I can’t either.” Derek admitted with a smile. “Maybe for our next case, if Hotch is still gone, we can share a room.”</p><p>Spencer smiled this time and felt all that panic vanished into thin air, like it had never been there and he was back to blushing. Maybe that’s why Derek smiled at him. “I would like that, very much.”</p><p>“Me too.”</p><p>The moment of silence they shared was anything but quiet. Spencer could practically hear Derek’s heart beating, it matched the fast pace of the pulse at his throat, throbbing repeatedly. His own pulse was in his throat, making it hard to swallow, hard to breathe and he was sure Derek could see him start to sweat. Nervous, in a state of panic, like he always seemed to be. It wasn’t the silence that made him that way though, it was the tension. The way their eyes met over again before they looked away, it was in the air, carried on the fan as it spun above them.</p><p>Times like these, when it was literally too much to be around him, Spencer wanted to run until he didn’t feel it anymore. But sometimes, his body wanted just the opposite. He had lingering thoughts about what it would feel like to go to him, to hug him instead of running, to feel that warmth, that companionship he only felt with Derek. The hug would be more than satisfying, even if he wasn’t very good at it. Everyone needed human contact, even him.</p><p>“I should go.” Spencer said instead of blurting out everything he just thought up. It wasn’t relevant. “Thanks for talking with me. I think it helped.”</p><p>“I’m glad it helped, Reid.” Derek said softly, his arms crossed to hide his chest. “Do you want to stay? We can talk a little more.”</p><p>“I really shouldn’t.” Spencer lied, moving towards the door. Nothing he wanted would happen, nothing mutual. Derek was just a good man, being a good friend. Nothing more. He gripped the doorknob. “Goodnight.”</p><p>Without a reply, he opened the door. For a minute he wondered why Derek didn’t reply, but pushed it back into the other locked spaces in his mind where he could take it out and examine it later and decide how to feel. The door was open, now all he had to do was walk through it, then down the hall to his own room. But his feet wouldn’t move. He felt frozen in place, his feet stuck in concrete. </p><p>“Don’t go.” Derek said, standing right behind him. “I don’t want to be alone anymore than you do.”</p><p>Spencer’s breath caught in his lungs. Now he really couldn’t move. </p><p>“Will you stay with me?”</p><p>Deep breaths helped, his chest wasn’t so tight it ached and he could finally reply, even knowing his voice was high pitched, nervous. “There is only one bed.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>Sweat was gathering on his forehead and he had to swipe his arm across it before he dripped. “Maybe I could sleep on the couch.”</p><p>Derek took another step, his hand slowly moving around Spencer’s sides so he didn’t spook him. As careful as he was, he still flinched. “I meant in the bed.”</p><p>“You’re too wide for the couch.” Spencer replied, sounding as dumb as he felt. He knew what Derek meant, but it could have been his mind playing tricks again and he needed him to say it. </p><p>“Yeah, I am.” Derek now held both Spencer’s sides and slowly pulled him back a step until his nose brushed the back of wavy hair. “I meant we could share the bed, but you already knew that.”</p><p>Maybe he’d fallen asleep while reading because Derek was touching him. His hands were on his sternum, his chest against his back, his breath in his ear. There was no space between them and it was enough to take his breath away. No one touched him like that, no one and he suddenly needed to feel it all over his body. </p><p>“We want the same things, Spencer.” Derek used his first name to ensure he had his attention. </p><p>“I’m not sure that’s correct.” Spencer swallowed, his breathing increasing rapidly. </p><p>Derek slowly rubbed his lips against the exposed skin behind Spencer’s neck. Just a little section between the hem of his cardigan and the tips of his hair. It was smooth and smelled like organic body wash, the same kind Spencer had been using for years. “I’ve seen the way you look at me, Spencer. I know because I’m looking at you when you look away. I feel what you feel, I want what you want.”</p><p>It was all happening too fast and he bolted forward, dislodging Derek’s hands. He turned, rubbing the back of his neck, feeling his lips, he combed through his hair. His heart beating like crazy. “That’s impossible. I would have seen the signs before. I would have realized it.”</p><p>“You’re too far in your head.” Derek approached him slowly again, doing his best to show how honest he was being. “The signs were there. They’ve always been there.”</p><p>“No, they haven’t.” Spencer ran though every memory, every action he could recall and Derek had always been there. Always looking, always smiling, always wanting to help, asking to be near him. His eyes widened and he met Derek’s. “Why didn’t I see it?”</p><p>Derek took the risk and cupped his face, finally being able to smooth his thumbs against the blush that highlighted Spencer’s cheeks. “You saw it. From that first moment but you refused to let yourself have what you wanted. I want you, Spencer.”</p><p>While he was busy trying to find the right words, too busy to notice the steady stream of tears sliding down his face, Derek was pulling him forward and before he could react, their lips were touching. It was warm and slick and heavenly. He didn’t react for a moment, unsure if he really did fall asleep or if it was real, but when Derek licked along his lips, he let out a surprise gasp, one he wasn’t used to hearing from himself, then molded his lips against Derek’s and kissed him back. He didn’t know what to do with his hands, knowing he couldn’t leave them flailing around, he finally let them settle on Derek’s sides, noting how warm his skin was compared to his cold hands. </p><p>“Your hands.” Derek flinched, chuckling as the kiss ended. “They’re cold.”</p><p>“Sorry.” Spencer moved his hands, but Derek forced them back against his body, his middle this time. “You kissed me.” He said bluntly, making sure it was real and when Derek smiled in that mischievous way, he knew it was. “Why?”</p><p>“Because we both wanted me to.” Derek kissed him again, barely a peck of his lips. “I think we have a lot to talk about, but maybe we can wait until morning.”</p><p>“Yeah, morning would be better. It’ll give me a chance to figure out what happened just now.” Spencer still didn’t have his hands, and he couldn’t look away from how pale he looked compared to Derek. “I think I might have fallen asleep at some point.”</p><p>“Trust me, this is very real.” Derek stepped back, bringing Spencer with him. “We should lay down.”</p><p>The bed was suddenly huge, taking up the entire room and he couldn’t look away from it. Derek was leading him to it with the intent of them sleeping together. Just sleep, actual sleep instead of other things. And he went willingly, step after step, his hands on Derek’s body, Derek’s hands on his. </p><p>“I’ve never slept with anyone before.” Spencer blurted once they stopped moving and realized what he said. “Of course I’ve slept with people, I didn’t mean it like that.”</p><p>Derek grinned. “I know you didn’t. I haven’t slept with anyone like this either but I’m looking forward to it.” </p><p>Not knowing what to do in a situation like that, Spencer just stood there. Eventually Derek took control, like he always did, and slowly lifted the bottom of his cardigan. He was bare chested in seconds, taking his hands away to cover himself. Derek wouldn’t have that, he immediately grabbed his hands and pulled them away from his body, settling back on his stomach. </p><p>“No more hiding.” Derek turned, peeling back the messy blankets, then reached over and clicked the light off. “Come on, in you go.”</p><p>Spencer clumsily climbed in the bed, embarrassed because he got stuck on the blankets and his pajama pants and literally everything else. He finally got settled on the far side and laid back, stiff as a board, he didn’t know what to do or how to lay, so he just kept still. He watched Derek climb in with ease, as he mastered all things, and the soft blankets were being pulled up his body. </p><p>“Don’t be nervous, it’s just me.” Derek turned on his side, facing him. </p><p>“I think that makes it worse.” Spencer didn’t turn, he couldn’t move. It forced Derek to rise up on one elbow to look down at him and he wondered what Derek saw. Then he leaned in again and Spencer barely had time to wet his lips before they were kissing again. This time, he didn’t hesitate, he even moved one hand to Derek’s smooth jaw, holding him, and kissed him back with mock confidence. It lasted seconds, if that, but it felt like hours. “I like when you do that.”</p><p>Derek smiled fondly, moving a piece of hair from Spencer’s face and he tucked it behind his ear, then thumbed at his earlobe. “I like when I do it too. And as much as I would love to keep kissing you until that blush spreads all the way down your chest, I think we need to get some sleep.”</p><p>At that, he blushed even harder and Derek winked. “Yeah, that’s probably best.”</p><p>“Yes it is.” He kissed his lips, then one cheek while his hands were busy turning Spencer’s body away from him. “Turn over for me.”</p><p>Spencer turned, facing away from him, unsure what was happening. He wanted to see Derek when he fell asleep, not the wall opposite him. He was about to say something when Derek moved up behind him, that large, overly warm chest pressed tightly against his back. He gasped without meaning to, the heat contrast to his own skin was almost painful, but comforting on a whole new level. Then his strong arms came around his sides, pulling him back impossibly closer, then the soft feel of Derek’s cheek as he nuzzled into his neck. </p><p>“This is what I want.” Derek kissed at his neck, soft, slow kisses. His fingertips lightly moved over his skin in soothing passes. “Is this okay?”</p><p>“Y-yeah.” Spencer cleared his voice after he stuttered. It took awhile, but he settled into the bed, back into his chest and loved the way he felt at that moment. Safe, warm, happy. It soothed something inside him that made his hackles rise. “It feels nice.”</p><p>Derek kissed his jaw, rising up a little to see his smile. “Yeah it does. Try and get some sleep, okay? We have a long day ahead of us.”</p><p>Sleep was already happening. He was too relaxed to stay alert and once that relaxation took hold of him, his body and his mind realized how tired he was. His eyes fluttered closed, his head felt heavy as he leaned into the last of those kisses and when it felt like he had no control, his arms folded against Derek’s, holding him back. </p><p>“Goodnight, Derek.” Spencer said sleepily, staying awake long enough to hear the response. </p><p>“Goodnight, pretty boy.”</p>
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